Running the Numbers

I'm sure most of you would agree that you are not one-dimensional. Hell, you're probably not even two dimensional, a piece of paper with a front and a back. If you're like me, your faces look more like this or even this.

I think we all have our certain set of numbers we show freely to the world. Maybe some of us have a set of numbers for our blog, another set for our family, and one for each group of friends. Perhaps you have a set of "mommy" numbers and a set of "girlfriend" numbers. Or a set of "daughter" numbers and a set of "wife" numbers.

The more balanced people in the world seem to be good at throwing their dice regularly. They give themselves an opportunity to show each face on a regular basis, to let their numbers breathe.

Me? I have three basic sets of numbers. I have "wife" numbers, those I feel comfortable showing around my husband, and "public" numbers, which are shown to everyone else. It takes something special to make me feel safe enough to let the third set of numbers out of the corner, where they stand, nose-to-wall, like a naughty child in time-out.

That third set, standing in the corner, are the numbers of my purest self. They don't get shown to many people, whether for fear of rejection, judgment, or something else entirely. They're the completely unfiltered, unabashed side of me, with no expectations or apologies. They're real, and they're raw. And they've memorized the pattern on the wallpaper and are starting to get antsy.

What are your numbers, and how frequently do you give your dice a toss? What happens to you if your numbers don't get to come out of the corner and play?